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Very Important News!
Anna Paulina Luna is a 35-year-old mother of one, who served 5 years in the Air Force before winning the 13th Congressional District of Florida back in 2022. She defeated some Democrat libtard who used to be a senior advisor to Barack Obama. The Heritage Foundation rated Luna 98% based on her voting record in the 118th Congress (the average Republican score is 75%). She appears to be a rock-ribbed conservative. She is also very, very, very hot and used to design and model bathing suits that she sold before joining Congress.
We knew this. We were aware! Ms. Luna has been a staple in the "put my ass in your asshole" slot of our Cloth Off Friday video for the past six weeks or so! Rep Luna won the Itty Bitty Titty Committee Division of 2023 our Milkers of the Year Award. We have to admit that it's slightly frustrating that (yet again) people are discovering things that Flappr has been tweeting about for the last 6 months. Oh well, it happens. This is our life. Flappr is doomed to obscurity.
The most hilarious part of the masses "discovering" Luna's swimsuit modeling days is that they posted these videos thinking this would somehow embarrass or take her down. What fucking imbeciles. Do they have eyes? This woman is fucking gorgeous! They did her a favor! Luna is somehow now overlooked among Republican hotties in Congress, with Nancy Mace and Lauren Boebert soaking up most of that type of attention. Untold numbers of people now know that this ravenous Republican MILF exists. The haters came for this Latina Queen and only made her 10x more powerful in the process.
Luna, for her part, was not phased by her videos being shared, stating in a post on X that she was "confirming that I have indeed worn swimsuits and you can tell I am biologically a woman." There was a time and place when such bikini videos might destroy a sitting Congresswoman. In an ideal world, things would still be that way. The whole thing is a bit unbecoming if I am being honest, but this is the world we live in, so attractive members of the GOP should take advantage of their beauty. With few exceptions - libtards are uglier than right-wingers. Humans are biologically coded to prefer attractive faces over less attractive ones. Babies exhibit this preference from their first moments on earth - people will drift towards smoke shows over pink-haired-land whales. May as well use the tools at our disposal.
In this house, we support Based Right-Wing MILFs.
Grok 2.0: is here; allows users to generate images from depths of Hades.
For those of you unaware, Grok is Elon Musk's generative AI platform which is available to users who subscribe to Twitter Premium. I asked Grok to describe itself and it told me that it is "AI with a dash of wit, a sprinkle of rebellion, and a whole lot of outside-the-box thinking, courtesy of xAI." Grok went on to explain that it is "not your average, run-of-the-mill AI" and that it has "a bit of a wild streak, ready to push the envelope and maybe even tear it a little" but wanted to remind me that it "keeps it playful, not pornographic" because it has standards albeit ones "drawn with a very thick, very wobbly line."
A bit cringe, but still somewhat charming for non-sentient code.
The question is what do we do with Grok and its competitors? Sure, it has some use, you can ask Grok to tell you the weather, write you a haiku, or summarize the Finnish tradition of hardening for a saucy video . . . but all of that is of fairly limited value. Sure, there are some legitimate uses of this technology, but for now, it seems like its biggest mainstream use is to generate horrifying images of famous people in various situations and, predictably, states of undress.
This has been the case since OpenAI launched DALL-E in January 2021 and users flooded social media with generated images of Shrek dressed as a member of the SS and fairly rudimentary (except for the octogenarian orbs) depictions of Nancy Pelosi in a bikini walking down the beach. The only thing that has changed is the quality and finer details of the artwork.
So when Grok 2.0 launched on Wednesday morning, we saw much of the same. There was Travis Kelce and Taylor Swift committing acts of terror, mafioso Elmo shooting Big Bird in a St. Valentine's Day-type massacre, a shirtless Trump and Calcium Cannon Kamala swimming in a pool, and, who could forget, Michaelangelo (TMNT variety) crucified on the cross while Master Splinter looks on with despair. And these were just examples of what @jarvis_best posted on his feed by noon! Degeneracy was everywhere! I should know, I was responsible for some of it!
To me, this begs an important question - at the end of the day, what will we use this technology for? Will our existence be rendered so irrelevant that we will only use AI to giggle away our sorrows by trying to find ways to trick GenAI systems into generating images of Eleanor Roosevelt with comically large breasts? Have we reached that point already? I hope not and I don't believe that will be the case. I think that once personal computing power catches up to the seemingly limitless potential of AI we will eventually find ways to make AI useful in our daily lives. Wearable tech - glasses, watches, and implants seem like the most likely use case.
Until then, people are just having fun, and whenever humans discover new technology our first instinct seems to be to try and use such innovations as a means for sexual gratification and/or deploy it in some fashion to insult different nations or races of people. This isn't an endorsement of our depravity, it's just a statement of fact. We are flawed creatures. Flawed and horny creatures.
For now, Grok 2.0 is just that - a gizmo to pass the time. Still pretty cool, though.
According to the article, the captain of an ultra-elite, $5 billion UK nuclear submarine "filmed a sex tape with an underling while at sea". This nauseating navalist might have even gotten away with his debauchery if he hadn't allegedly decided to start "sharing the X-rated selfies" of the deed. The details of this story are sparse, so it's unclear whether the sex was one sailor loaded his "torpedo" (penis) into the "tube" (butthole) of his shipmate (gay sex) or if this was encounter was "hot racking" of the heterosexual variety.
Not sure that matters, but exhibitionism seems to be a thing among gay men these days. Gay men drink each other's pee in public. Cornholing each other in the house chambers. Exposing their implants at the white house. Twerking with Tim Walz at pride parades in front of children. Lots of this! Disgusting! But again, the story does not state whether the nuclear submarine captain (who was a man) schtuped a male or female underling, so we do not know.
What we do know is that another person who was entrusted with the most serious of responsibilities could not be bothered to take that responsibility seriously. You're the captain of a fucking nuclear submarine! You have dozens of other humans under your charge! You could start WW3 and get us all killed! Why are you so horned up that you not only fuck one of your shipmates but also film and share it with others! Do you have no appreciation for the mission at hand?
This type of flippancy towards duty is how Presidents almost get merc'd in Butler, PA, and speaks to the unseriousness of the modern man. We are the weak men that lead to hard times. We cannot appreciate the horrors our forebears endured to make the good times we currently enjoy. If we cannot suffer the minor inconveniences of our duties (such as not fucking subordinates on nuked-up submarines), what will we look like when faced with a true challenge.
Troubling times await. Also, they were probably gay, right?
Regular News!
Trump x Elon: the Twitter Spaces experience
It started about 45 minutes late (thanks to what Elon says was due to a target DDoS attack), Trump's audio wasn't great (he did sound a bit . . . LISSSPY), but Trump's much-anticipated return to Twitter was epic, all things considered. They talked for over two hours! They riffed on a wide range of subjects. They just chatted about the state of the world while over a million people tuned in to listen to them speak in an audio-only format.
The whole thing was a bit surreal. It wasn't a podcast, because it was live. It wasn't a radio interview, because it wasn't an interview - they were just chatting. It felt like what I would imagine the FDR fireside chats would've been like if FDR wasn't a socialist and talked about autistic things space travel, and how the various models of Teslas spell out SEXY.
There were many vintage Trump moments, like when told Elon that he was an "interesting character" in the most endearing boomer way possible. Or when Trump said Elon had a "fertile mind", which is humorous because Elon Musk has a lot of sex and a lot of children. Perhaps the funniest moment of the evening was when Trump recalled a conversation he had with Putin on invading Ukraine, saying that he told the Russian despot 'You can’t do it, Vladimir' and that Putin said, "No way" to which Trump replied "way." It was very Wayne's World.
The media, of course, hated the endeavor. Earlier in the day, a Washington Post reporter asked Karine Jean-Pierre what the government was doing to prevent such "misinformation" from being shared on the internet. Libtards whaled about Trump "slurring" his words or how he said that they made Kamala Harris look like his wife on her Time Magazine cover. Kamala Harris' campaign issued a statement bizarrely connecting this conversation to Project 2025 but unsurprisingly refused Elon Musk's offer to hold a space of its own with him on the platform.
The conversation was mostly non-substantive, outside of Musk proposing a commission to essentially review and audit government spending, but it was an enjoyable listen between two of the most powerful and significant men in the world. I'm not sure if this type of format helps win over any independents, but it did reinvigorate the Trump base on Twitter, which spent most of the previous few days toiling in doomerism and badly needed something positive. Perhaps most importantly for Trump, the Elon convo broke a 20-day news cycle of pure, uncut, and unrelenting syrupy Kamala Harris propaganda - even if just for an evening.
Thank God for that.
The Other McCain: Rule 5 Sunday: Biker Babe In Bikini; Watching CNN (So You Don’t Have To); and Trump Derangement Syndrome and the Media’s ‘Misinformation’ Obsession
The one in which Robert Stacy McCain takes on TDS:
"All the insanity since November 2016, you must understand, can be traced to two simple facts: Trump won and Hillary lost, and these facts were never accepted by Democrats, least of all Hillary herself. To this day, we’re still dealing with the consequences of the resulting delusion — Trump Derangement Syndrome — and one symptomatic manifestation is the media’s obsession with “misinformation."
Not included in this blog, but something I saw earlier this week that annoyed the shit out of me was this clip from some cunt (male cunt) at the Washington Post:
A journalist, who enjoys the protections afforded by the First Amendment, wants the government to "do something" to prevent two American citizens from speaking to each other over the internet. The sheer fucking audacity. No single entity or individual has shared more damaging "misinformation" than the media over the past decade. None. It's not even close.
The media slandered a high school kid because he wore the wrong hat and smiled. The media pushed COVID hysteria, downplayed the damage done by remote learning, and sentenced countless numbers of kids to learning deficits they may never recover from. The media perpetuated the lie that Michael Brown held his hands up before being shot in Ferguson, MO, despite the Obama DOJ's investigation revealing the opposite. The media still pushes that lie. The media championed "social justice" after a criminal died in police custody and generated a narrative on the pandemic of police murdering unarmed blacks when the actual number was 11 in 2021. Cities burned and people died because of those lies.
The media is the virus. If anyone needs their freedoms re-examined - it's them.
David Thompson: Shush, Daddy’s Being Fabulous
The one where David shares the story of women whose partners, or fathers, have ‘transitioned’:
Only one thought comes to mind - if my wife asked to borrow my shaving cream and scratching at her imaginary balls, we'd have to divorce. I don't care how much I love her. That's unhealthy for all involved, especially our children.
Odds and ends:
Kamala Harris is a literal communist; wants to price control groceries.
Secret Service Agent abandoned Trump's post to breastfeed; they might be trying to get him killed.
Retarded Australian Break Dancing PhD says ‘Please stop’ dunking on her for pathetic Olympic performance.
Anna Paulina Luna embraces Sundress Nationalism.
Psychotic Libtard Lorenz is being investigated for posting a photo of Biden and calling him a war criminal.
XY boxer, Imane Khelif, gets a "glow up"; still looks masculine
Siraj Hashmi bought a "dope" new shirt.
Mujahed "Jay" Kobbe is ruthless.
Sports! Sports! Sports!
The Vikings are cursed: J.J. McCarthy out for season with a torn meniscus
Let's take a look back at some recent Vikings QB history:
2005 - 3-time Pro Bowl QB, Duante Culpepper, shreds his knee in a game against the Panthers - ending his career one season after throwing for 4,717 yards, 39 TDs, and only 11 interceptions.
2016 - the Vikings are Super Bowl contenders and Teddy Bridgewater is much hyped going into his third season but suffers a dislocated knee before the start of the regular season and never plays for the team again.
2023 - Kirk Cousins leads the Vikings back to .500 and is playing the best football of his up-and-down Minnesota career but tears his Achilles and bolts to the Falcons in the offseason.
2011-2014 - the team, for some reason, starts Christian Ponder 38 times.
2024 - J.J. McCarthy looks great in his first preseason game but tears his meniscus and is out for the season.
The Bears get a lot of shit for having terrible QBs, but the Vikings have endured quite a bit of suffering themselves. This team is cursed. Despite rooting for a divisional rival, I don't like seeing J.J. McCarthy getting injured. He's a Chicagoland guy. A hockey player. A champion. This sucks for the league. Nobody wants to watch a season full of Sam Darnold . . . do we?
Caleb Williams: looks like he MIGHT not suck
It was just one game, but Caleb Williams looked pretty damn good in his NFL debut against the Bills on Saturday. This dude gets dragged on the internet so much for being a fruity Zoomer that I think people forget that Caleb is pretty good at throwing the football! Look at that throw! That sort of off-platform whip looked, dare I say, kind of Mahomes-esque? He will still probably suck because the Bears are cosmically prohibited from having a franchise QB, but he does have the talent and did look the part in his first showing.
Fair Warning: if, by the grace of God, Caleb Williams does NOT suck, I get to experience having an elite QB lead my team for the first time - I am going to become a cocky, miserable prick. I will defend Caleb with every bone in my body (but will never put a bone in his or any other man's body). I will drag haters in the replies. I will start painting my nails in solidarity with my QB. I will purchase very expensive handbags that look suspiciously like purses but are definitely NOT purses. I will drive to Green Bay and shit down the throats of my in-laws.
This is just a warning. He will probably still suck. That's just what we do.
I am still pretty annoyed with Outkick's slander of Kayla Simmons last week, but they are right to anoint Brylie St. Clair with the title of 'World's Hottest Professional Softball Player'. She is the 'World's Hottest Professional Softball Player'. In fact, outside of Jennie Finch, she might be the only 'hot' softball player I've ever seen.
Is that rude to say? It feels kind of rude. But you know what I mean, right? Like female softball players tend to be . . . beefy and butch. There isn't a whole lot of femininity in the sport. Maybe I'm missing something. I will do better to educate myself on the subject, but my anecdotal research suggests lots of ugmos.
Not Brylie, though. Brylie is feminine, and pretty and seems to enjoy being a girly girl who also plays softball. Women's sports seem to have gone through a phase where burly lesbians tried to gate-keep beautiful women out of their sports. That seems to be changing with rockets like Livvy Dunne and Brylie St. Clair reaching the top of their respective sports while also being smoke shows.
That's a good thing! Softball is actually fun to watch!
We must investigate the literalness of this BSO headline (for journalistic purposes):
Yeah, that's Canadian "Olympic track star, Alysha Newman," and she posted this "poolside thirst trap of herself" in a "black bikini." This is a literal BSO headline.
As an update to our coverage on Aylsha last week, Ms. Newman shared with the media that her OnlyFans account "crashed' as a result of her bronze medal twerking incident. It is a sad reflection on the state of Western civilization that a fine-tuned athlete like Alysha had to resort to such indignities as a result of the failed globalist policies of Justin Trudeau. If not for the progeny of Fidel Castro and some French-Canadian sluuuuut, women like Alysha might have had a chance to thrive without having to resort to e-thottery. Trudeau must be stopped. We must save our eGirl sports influencers from this life. This is our charge in life.
Nevertheless, we are happy for Newman's success and we wish her good health and good fortune in her eGirl sports influencer endeavors.
Meme of the Week!
This week's top meme honors go to @Magills_ for this meme of a woman's nether region that looked conspicuously like Homer Simpson's mouth. The meme originated from a video posted on Wednesday that I must have been tagged in no less than 40 times (due to people erroneously believing I run a sm*t operation). The video, captioned "Those wrist cameras are only £29.99 on Amazon .. Bargain", shows a bikini-clad latina trying on some type of strange wrist apparatus (presumably a wrist camera). She also happens to have a ridiculous camel toe and two of the most pronounced labia majoras ever captured on film. Observe:
What a weird fucking video. I think she's speaking Portuguese. Maybe she's Brazilian? Either way, from a certain angle, her vagina does look like Homer Simpson's mouth, which @Magills_ correctly observed in his meme.
You know, horny memes are a genre that I don't indulge in much (don't believe @Magills_ does much either). Sexual jokes feel a bit too easy and gross for my liking (don't act so surprised, assholes). Yet, now and then, you see human genitals paired with the right type of innocent "oh yeah" type of joke and it's gut-busting funny. This was one of those times.
I reached out to @Magills_ for his reaction to winning this week's award and here is what he shared with me for publication:
So true.
Some Flappr Blogs!
IF YOU'VE MADE IT THIS FAR, LEAVE A COMMENT AND LET US KNOW YOU'RE ALIVE.
Still alive. Thx for reminding us every Fri reasons to remain so. XD
I hope you get a good qb. I want to see you insufferable.
Caleb Williams is going to break the hearts of every bears fan and we're all here for it
"shit down my in laws throats."
Now that's a bears fan.